The events leading up to baby girl #2's birth are VITAL pieces that contribute to this cuh-razy roller coaster ride. Enjoy
Saturday, May 9th
Big sister Jovi wakes up in the wee hours of the morning, making weird coughing noises over the baby monitor. I go into the spare room (since Jake had been sleeping in there, to help give me a better night's sleep the last week of my pregnancy), I look at the baby monitor & see that Jovi is tossing & turning in her sleep, so I go in her room & immediately smelt vomit. I went back in the spare room, to wake up Jake and let him know I'd need help w/Jovi. He wakes up all started, and we go into Jovi's room to see the damage. We turned on the light & could see her face and hair had been covered in it. Poor thing. I felt so bad. I felt like the world's WORST mom for not catching this earlier, and for letting her suffer in her crib alone. Ugh. Even as I type this, my stomach cringes. So, we get Jovi out of her bed, throw her in the bath & proceed to watch her vomit. Immediately I regret letting our neighbors come over for a play date, just a few dates prior. Their household was just getting over the flu & strep throat, and I knew I couldn't get it, seeing as (one) I was pregnant, and (two) I was just days away from my scheduled C-Section.
Sunday, May 10th
Jake wakes up and says he doesn't feel well. "Great," I thought. "He's catching what Jovi has and I'm probably next." Jake proceeds to take care of sick Jovi, and himself, so I don't get sick. This was fun! Lock my bed-ridden self in our room and don't breathe in any germs, sanitize often, drink plenty of fluids, and
stay away from the sickies. These were all things I was trying to tell myself, so I could avoid this sickness like the black plague. Need I remind you this was our last weekend to get things done before baby sister came. My nesting self was fuh-reaking out.
Monday, May 11th
Jake wakes up vomiting & has the same symptoms as Jovi. Awesome! I had a doctor's appointment that afternoon, so I figured I'd just go alone & leave Jake at home w/Jovi (who was still recovering). It was hard to leave him, knowing how sick he was (poor thing), but I couldn't take Jovi & expose HER to everyone at the doctor's office. It was my only choice. So off to my appointment I went *** Insert crazy time here *** I had my NST (non-Stress Test) first, and things weren't looking to well. We had trouble before w/the last few NSTs, but thought things would get better. They didn't. Baby girl's heart rate took one too many dips during this NST and I had now surpassed the 20 minute, 40 minute, and now the 60 minute NST. Baby girl had failed all 3 and my doctor was worried. We completely bi-passed the ultrasound & visit w/my doctor, since the NST was taking so long. My doctor came into the room where I was getting my NST done, and said he wanted me to go to the hospital to be monitored there (that way if things got REALLY bad, I was at least at the hospital and one step closer to having baby girl if needed). My doctor said if baby's heart rate kept dropping, that we may just do the surgery that night. Panic begins. I told my doctor Jake was at home sick w/the flu w/Jovi. My doctor knew I was worried about germs & if it'd be safe to have baby on Wednesday, so he suggested we reschedule & do surgery Friday morning instead of Wednesday. I felt better w/that idea, knowing everyone in our household would be well over the flu by then, and that that'd buy us some more time to do some last minute cleaning & sanitize our house after the flu. I really just wanted to do whatever was best for baby & was fine w/whatever my doctor told me, but I was really scared when he told me to go to labor & delivery right then and there. My doctor could see the panic & tears in my eyes. He assured me it would be okay, and that I just needed to head over to L&D as soon as possible. He said if L&D sent me home, that I'd need to schedule another NST for Wednesday. So…I end the conversation w/my doctor & head out. BTW I didn't have anything w/me. No hospital bag, no diaper bag, no phone charger, etc. I was panicked! Literally, all I had with me, was my dying phone, sunglasses, wallet, and chapstick. (The chapstick is a vital necessity). Normally I would leave the house w/my diaper bag (it doubles as my purse), but since Jovi projectile vomited on it, earlier that morning, I took out the few things I'd need for my drive to the doctor's office. Anyway... I check out at the front desk w/my favorite receptionist's (Cathy), and she asks me if I'll need another appointment. She knew we didn't have anything else scheduled (since surgery was scheduled for Wednesday), but protocol is that they have to ask if I need a follow-up. I let her know I needed one for Wednesday & that surgery was pushed back to Friday… And then I began to cry. I just completely broke down in front of all these people waiting in the waiting area. Cathy asked me if I was okay. Bring on the water works! I told her that Dr. Allen was sending me over to L&D and that I was freaking out because my husband was at home w/our little girl and that I was completely alone. She could see the panic & fear and assured me (like Dr. Allen) that it'd all be okay. How could everyone be so sure?!?! So… I walk out of the doctor's office BAWLING, and call Jake as soon as I got outside. I told him everything that happened during the appointment and that my doctor was sending me to labor & delivery. I could hear the panic in his voice & knew how helpless he must've felt, knowing he was at home sick w/our little girl and could literally do nothing. Sooooo I call my mom and tell her the Reader's Digest version, as I'm driving up the street to the hospital. She knew our sickie situation at home, and knew how scared I was, so she asked if I wanted my sister to stay at the hospital w/me. HECK YES! I hang up my phone WHICH, NEED I REMIND YOU has only 20% battery life at this time. I try to keep it together as I waddle into the hospital's main doors andwalk waddle over to the elevator and shackingly push the number 3 button to L&D. I get out on the 3rd floor and start having flash backs of how scared I was when I was at this very same place just over a year ago. Oh how scared I was to have our first child. Those exact same feelings I had 14 months ago, were the exact same feelings I had at this time. I picked up the phone that is just outside the elevator, and anxiously wait for someone to pick up on the other side. (They don't let just anyone in L&D. You either have to have a code, or an appointment to get through the security locked doors). "Can I help you," a nurse asks on the other end of the phone. I fearfully tell her that my doctor had sent me over to be monitored. She buzzed me in. I check in at the front desk, give all my personal information, and sign my life away on the electronic screen… All while I'm trying to keep it together. Which, by the way, I'm not. I get checked in and they put me in this small room and have me wait for another nurse to come in and get me hooked up to the NST machine. Enter nurse. 20 questions begiiiin… Now. My sister walks in as I'm finishing the 20 questions survey w/the nurse, and I immediately start to calm down. Jake texts me & asks if I'd like him to send someone over for a blessing. HECK YES! Things were starting to fall into place and I was beginning to feel at ease. I'm now hooked up to the monitors and baby girl is being watched. After being there for about an hour and a half and Sean and Jake's co-worker stopping by to give me a blessing, I am finally released & sent home. Baby girl's heart rate was fine and it just so turns out so was I.
Tuesday, May 12th
Jake's feeling better and so is Jovi, thank goodness! The hospital calls & tells me what time to be at there the next day. Errr…. Correction. Surgery's been pushed back to Friday. I let them know my doctor's office was supposed to have called them to notify them. They said they never got a phone call and that I needed to call my doctor's office & have them call to verify. Soooo…. I call my doctor's office, the staff apologized and called the hospital to reschedule… Check. Surgery moved to Friday. Sanitizing and cleaning the house are in order. Thanks Jake! I release myself from bed rest and decide I need to take 2-3 walks around the block PER day. I may have walked really slow and doubled our walking time, but hey- it made me feel good and calmed me. I put Jovi in the stroller & walked her in the mornings and sometimes even in the afternoon as well. We'd take one walk as a family, after Jake would get home from work too. It felt good to get out of the house and waddle around. I was starting to get cabin fever. The ward members (who knew I was on bed rest) would stop and talk to me, if they were driving around or in their front yard. They would scold me & tell me to get back in bed. Ha! Yeah right.
Wednesday May 13th
Original surgery date: Jake goes back to work and I try to remain calm. Ha! Yeah right again. I go to our scheduled NST w/Jovi (meeting Jake there), and everything goes well. Doctor Allen reminds me surgery is set for Friday morning, and that the hospital would call me the day before, letting me know what time to be at the hospital.
Thursday, May 14th
Anxiously await mom/Nana to arrive (to help w/Jovi), and nervously wait for the hospital to call to let me know call time for Friday. They finally called me in the afternoon and said we had to be there @ 6:15 and that I couldn't eat past 10pm that evening. I called Jake and let him know and he freaked out w/how early it was. Ha! He is NOT a morning person at all. He already wanted to cancel hahaha
Friday, May 15th
Here's where the story picks up and everything starts to happen!!!!! Our alarms were set for 4:30am, seeing as we'd have to leave our house @ 5:30am. I'm usually the last one out of the house (on any given ocassion), and am ALWAYS running behind. Not on this date though. I was soooo nervous. And anxious. Jake and I start loading our car w/our bags, pillows, and blankets and my mom rubs my belly. A lot. Seriously? Now is not the time. Not only am I nervous as all heck, but we're on a deadline here. We notice it's raining, so Jake backs out his car and maneuvers it so I'm able to get in and not having to squeeze between the garage wall & the car. It was nice of him not making me have to get in the car w/all the rain. Side note: It was raining the day Jovi was born too. At least I think it was. I dunno, maybe not? I know it was overcast though! Anyway… We start heading out and I realize I forgot my wallet. I knew we'd need it in order to check in (proof of identity), so we turn around and head back. Ugh! Running late already. Jake runs in the house and grabs my wallet out of the diaper bag and off we went (again). We pull up to the hospital and it's not really raining, so we park and walk into the hospital together. I brought in my hospital bag and that was it. Jake would have time, later, to go out to the car and get everything else. We walk into the hospital and an employee stops me asking if today was my day hahaha I let her know it was and that I was really excited. Jake and I went up to the 3rd floor. I picked up the phone just outside the elevator and a nurse asks "How can I help you?"... This is it. We're goin in! Jake and I check in at the front desk, he asks (yet again) about the friendship bracelets, and they walk us to our room. We passed by the room where I was being monitored earlier that week. It was crazy to think that just a few days prior, I was in this tiny room POSSIBLY having our baby girl that night. And now, here we were just days later. I couldn't believe this was really happening. THIS WAS REALLY HAPPENING! I think I was freaking out so much, because I was more aware this time around, and my OB actually told me that I'd be walking myself into the operating room. That in itself freaked me out. I don't wanna walk in there & see everything. Although everything's covered (I know), it still just wasn't the same as being wheeled in. It was the whole thought behind it & that I knew what was going to be happening to me in just moments. (Okay, more like hours). Anyways…
I get checked into this labor & delivery room where this nice, older, lady greets me. She was so happy & chipper. At such an early hour too! I guess they're used to it though? Anyways…
I change into my hospital gown, out my clothes in a hospital bag, and sit down on the bed, waiting for the next nurse to come in.
Another little, older, lady comes in to give us our friendship bracelets, get me hooked up to an IV and asks me A TON of questions. I let the nurse know the IV in my hand was a tad bit uncomfortable, but she said that's normal and that after awhile my body would be used to it & to just wait it out. Sure enough, she was right. Smart lady. At this time I'm having all these fluids being pumped through my body. Naturally I ask what they're all for. The little nurse tells me they're pumping lots of fluid through my body, to help me through surgery and that often times it helps to not make you feel as nauseous. Thank goodness! Finally some anti nausea! I didn't want a repeat from last time. We all remember what happened last time, don't we? (Let me re-cap for you. I threw up just a few times. Just a few.) I was starting to feel a cold sensation through my IV in my hand. Weirdest feeling ever. The nurse said I was feeling all the fluids being pumped in my body.
After everything was all hooked up, I drank this citrus, tart drink. (I remembered this from last time.) The nurse let me know Trish, the anesthesiologist, would be in to talk to me. I was excited to talk to her & let her know my worries & fears from last time. Enter in Trish. Her voice sounded raspy. "Great," I thought. "She's sick." Nope. She let me know it was just allergies. Niiiice. (Like they would let a sicky in a sterile environment anyway). Trish told me it's best if I'm just open & honest w/her and let her know ahead of time how I'm feeling, so she can try and help me. I was feeling pretty good right about now. I felt I already could trust her. She felt so bad for what happened w/my previous experience & wanted so badly to make this a positive one.
She asked if I had hydromorph last time. I wasn't sure what I had, as it was such a blur, but I know I had MORPHINE and it was brutal. That's what made me spew! Trish let me know I probably threw up because my body was laboring for so long (32 hours), and had an empty stomach. My body also probably went into shock and was just exhausted! I was still hesitant to get this cousin of morphine, and I think she could tell. She was very convincing, this one, and wanted me ever so badly to get this in my IV so I agreed to it. She said a lot of people come off of it itching and that's normal, but that she'd personally rather have the itching allergic reaction, than feel more pain. I agreed and Jake and I both thought it'd be a good idea to get it.
Trish left the room & kept coming back to check in on me. This was making me feel even better! (Poor lady. She could sense my fear).
The nurse came back in to let me know Dr. Allen should be in soon (provided he's on time), and that they were just finishing up another surgery and then I could head back.
Cool.
Dr. Allen was scheduled to arrive @ 8am and that he did! He obviously came straight to my room when he arrived, since he still had his coat on and it had a few fresh rain drops on it. Guess it was still sprinkling outside!
Dr. Allen asked if I was ready & that we'd be heading back shortly!
I asked the nurse if they were putting my cathiter in now, or if they were waiting for the epidural. She chuckled and told me they were nice enough to wait until I was nice and numb & comfortable. "WOW," I thought. "This is already a whole new experience and we've only just begun!" I couldn't wait to see what else was in store!!!! No really.
A team of nurses came in & let me know I could head on back. "Uh… I'm half naked and don't really feel like mooning everyone on the third floor," I told the nurses. They gave me another hospital gown and draped it over me like a cape. They let Jake know they were going to take me back & that they'd come back for him in a bit... And so the walk began.
I walk through a set of double doors. And then I see the OR
Right before I went in, they gave me a hair net (for sanitary purposes), and then I apologized to the nurse for not pulling my hair up. Can you tell I was nervous?!?!
I walk in the OR and they have me get on the operating table. So weird! I was half asleep & completely drugged last time, so I don't remember seeing the operating table. I do remember it feeling small, but I don't remember seeing it. (Just for the record, it does look really small BTW).
Trish comes in and sits behind me w/her table of "stuff" ie- drugs. She asks me to sit indian style on the operating table, and to tuck my neck into my chest. She puts in the epidural, except it's not really an epidural at all. It's different. It essentially does the same thing, but better! It's what they call a spinal. The epidural (I guess) can only get so close to your spine, while the SPINAL goes directly INTO your spine & kicks in quicker/works stronger. My doctor tried to explain this ahead of time, but I didn't believe him. Boy was this stuff great. I was already numb & it had only been a few minutes. AWESOME!
The doctor who'd be assisting (Dr. Clark) came in & let me know he'd be helping w/the surgery. I'd seen this doctor a couple times, throughout this pregnancy, whenever I'd have a random appointment & didn't care if I could get in with Dr. Allen. He was real nice and I liked him. (Actually, during one of my random visits w/him, he let me know he'd probably be assisting in the surgery with Dr. Allen, so that made me feel good, knowing I had already seen him a time or two prior).
So the epidural is now in at this point, and everything's working great. Vitals are looking good and I'm feeling awesome. Trish lets me know I can lay back & that she'll catch me on the table. I lean back & the L&D nurses put in my cathiter. I don't feel A THING and it's wonderful! They start putting iodine on my stomach, and prepping everything for surgery. The drape goes up.
In walks Jake. He tells me I'm doing great so far and I'm thinking "Nothing's happened!" hahaha
Dr. Allen starts the procedure and everything's going smoothly. They let Jake know they could see baby's head and that she'd be out soon. They asked Jake if he wanted to see them pull her out, so of course he stands up to see! I wanted pictures, but he couldn't do it. Oh well :) I understand it's not pretty.
Dr. Allen pulls out baby girl's head and says she has hair and is winking at us w/one eye open! Awwwwww!!!! I was excited she had hair, seeing as Jovi didn't have hardly any. The doctors told me I'd feel a lot of pressure, and to take a deep breath. WOW did I feel that! And out came baby! The nurse brought her over to me and I kissed her cheeks so many times! It was so great being as aware & alert as I was. I remember it perfectly. It felt so great to have her by my side. I gave her so many kiss on her cheeks. I remember I kept saying "Awwww!" She was crying so much, it was great! It's so good for them to get those lungs working.
They continue to stitch me up and everything's going smoothly. Jake is down in the nursery, taking pictures of her first bath & everything, since I was doing so great. I communicate w/Trish the whole time and let her know whenever I'd start feeling nauseous. She was so great, patting my arm, and just letting me know every step of the way how close we were getting to the end.
Surgery's complete.
The nurses move me to the recovery bed & this was the rough part I remember. No, I can't feel anything pain wise, but they have you roll onto your side and you feel like you're going to fall off the super small operating table. Anyway, that gets done and they wheel me away on my portable bed. That ride is THE worst. I felt so nauseous already and let the nurses know. They used one of Trish's tricks, and put the oxygen over my nose, to breathe in the cold, flowing air. It definitely helped, but man I felt like they were running through that hallway (even though I know they weren't).
So I get in my recovery room, which is the same room I was originally checked into. They sit me up and I immediately start throwing up. I was spewing for what felt like hours. It was over an hour that I was just throwing up & throwing up. I felt like I was going to pop out my stitches. At one point I even asked the nurse if I was going to rip through my stitches. She said I COULD, but that it wasn't likely. She let me know she was going to leave to go get something for me, and when she came back, it literally felt like HOURS had gone by. I was just sitting in my recovery room all alone, and drugged, and throwing up. I felt awful! The nurse knew I had to stop vomiting soon, and that I needed something quick. They ordered a prescription from the pharmacist, but it was taking longer than normal. The nurse called down there and ended up just picking it up herself. She ended up giving me something that helped me pretty quick. Boy was I thankful.
They finally wheeled me to my recovery room on the second floor, after I was stable enough. I felt so hot and was still super groggy, but I was starting to come out of it. And then I started throwing up again. Great. Jake was no where to be found yet.
*** Now the sad/scary part ***
Presley came out breathing about 100 breaths per minute. (They normally like to see newborns at about 60/70 BPM so that was high.) She was breathing so much & so fast, that she blew a hole in her lungs and it had already caused an infection. They took her, right away, to the level 2 nursery (which is just a step down from the NICU), and Jake was talking w/her pediatrician and nurses the whole time. He, later, came into my room, and tried to explain everything to me. I'm not really understanding, as I'm still coming off the drugs and am in MAJOR pain.
Sunday, May 10th
Jake wakes up and says he doesn't feel well. "Great," I thought. "He's catching what Jovi has and I'm probably next." Jake proceeds to take care of sick Jovi, and himself, so I don't get sick. This was fun! Lock my bed-ridden self in our room and don't breathe in any germs, sanitize often, drink plenty of fluids, and
stay away from the sickies. These were all things I was trying to tell myself, so I could avoid this sickness like the black plague. Need I remind you this was our last weekend to get things done before baby sister came. My nesting self was fuh-reaking out.
Monday, May 11th
Jake wakes up vomiting & has the same symptoms as Jovi. Awesome! I had a doctor's appointment that afternoon, so I figured I'd just go alone & leave Jake at home w/Jovi (who was still recovering). It was hard to leave him, knowing how sick he was (poor thing), but I couldn't take Jovi & expose HER to everyone at the doctor's office. It was my only choice. So off to my appointment I went *** Insert crazy time here *** I had my NST (non-Stress Test) first, and things weren't looking to well. We had trouble before w/the last few NSTs, but thought things would get better. They didn't. Baby girl's heart rate took one too many dips during this NST and I had now surpassed the 20 minute, 40 minute, and now the 60 minute NST. Baby girl had failed all 3 and my doctor was worried. We completely bi-passed the ultrasound & visit w/my doctor, since the NST was taking so long. My doctor came into the room where I was getting my NST done, and said he wanted me to go to the hospital to be monitored there (that way if things got REALLY bad, I was at least at the hospital and one step closer to having baby girl if needed). My doctor said if baby's heart rate kept dropping, that we may just do the surgery that night. Panic begins. I told my doctor Jake was at home sick w/the flu w/Jovi. My doctor knew I was worried about germs & if it'd be safe to have baby on Wednesday, so he suggested we reschedule & do surgery Friday morning instead of Wednesday. I felt better w/that idea, knowing everyone in our household would be well over the flu by then, and that that'd buy us some more time to do some last minute cleaning & sanitize our house after the flu. I really just wanted to do whatever was best for baby & was fine w/whatever my doctor told me, but I was really scared when he told me to go to labor & delivery right then and there. My doctor could see the panic & tears in my eyes. He assured me it would be okay, and that I just needed to head over to L&D as soon as possible. He said if L&D sent me home, that I'd need to schedule another NST for Wednesday. So…I end the conversation w/my doctor & head out. BTW I didn't have anything w/me. No hospital bag, no diaper bag, no phone charger, etc. I was panicked! Literally, all I had with me, was my dying phone, sunglasses, wallet, and chapstick. (The chapstick is a vital necessity). Normally I would leave the house w/my diaper bag (it doubles as my purse), but since Jovi projectile vomited on it, earlier that morning, I took out the few things I'd need for my drive to the doctor's office. Anyway... I check out at the front desk w/my favorite receptionist's (Cathy), and she asks me if I'll need another appointment. She knew we didn't have anything else scheduled (since surgery was scheduled for Wednesday), but protocol is that they have to ask if I need a follow-up. I let her know I needed one for Wednesday & that surgery was pushed back to Friday… And then I began to cry. I just completely broke down in front of all these people waiting in the waiting area. Cathy asked me if I was okay. Bring on the water works! I told her that Dr. Allen was sending me over to L&D and that I was freaking out because my husband was at home w/our little girl and that I was completely alone. She could see the panic & fear and assured me (like Dr. Allen) that it'd all be okay. How could everyone be so sure?!?! So… I walk out of the doctor's office BAWLING, and call Jake as soon as I got outside. I told him everything that happened during the appointment and that my doctor was sending me to labor & delivery. I could hear the panic in his voice & knew how helpless he must've felt, knowing he was at home sick w/our little girl and could literally do nothing. Sooooo I call my mom and tell her the Reader's Digest version, as I'm driving up the street to the hospital. She knew our sickie situation at home, and knew how scared I was, so she asked if I wanted my sister to stay at the hospital w/me. HECK YES! I hang up my phone WHICH, NEED I REMIND YOU has only 20% battery life at this time. I try to keep it together as I waddle into the hospital's main doors and
Tuesday, May 12th
Jake's feeling better and so is Jovi, thank goodness! The hospital calls & tells me what time to be at there the next day. Errr…. Correction. Surgery's been pushed back to Friday. I let them know my doctor's office was supposed to have called them to notify them. They said they never got a phone call and that I needed to call my doctor's office & have them call to verify. Soooo…. I call my doctor's office, the staff apologized and called the hospital to reschedule… Check. Surgery moved to Friday. Sanitizing and cleaning the house are in order. Thanks Jake! I release myself from bed rest and decide I need to take 2-3 walks around the block PER day. I may have walked really slow and doubled our walking time, but hey- it made me feel good and calmed me. I put Jovi in the stroller & walked her in the mornings and sometimes even in the afternoon as well. We'd take one walk as a family, after Jake would get home from work too. It felt good to get out of the house and waddle around. I was starting to get cabin fever. The ward members (who knew I was on bed rest) would stop and talk to me, if they were driving around or in their front yard. They would scold me & tell me to get back in bed. Ha! Yeah right.
Wednesday May 13th
Original surgery date: Jake goes back to work and I try to remain calm. Ha! Yeah right again. I go to our scheduled NST w/Jovi (meeting Jake there), and everything goes well. Doctor Allen reminds me surgery is set for Friday morning, and that the hospital would call me the day before, letting me know what time to be at the hospital.
Thursday, May 14th
Anxiously await mom/Nana to arrive (to help w/Jovi), and nervously wait for the hospital to call to let me know call time for Friday. They finally called me in the afternoon and said we had to be there @ 6:15 and that I couldn't eat past 10pm that evening. I called Jake and let him know and he freaked out w/how early it was. Ha! He is NOT a morning person at all. He already wanted to cancel hahaha
Friday, May 15th
Here's where the story picks up and everything starts to happen!!!!! Our alarms were set for 4:30am, seeing as we'd have to leave our house @ 5:30am. I'm usually the last one out of the house (on any given ocassion), and am ALWAYS running behind. Not on this date though. I was soooo nervous. And anxious. Jake and I start loading our car w/our bags, pillows, and blankets and my mom rubs my belly. A lot. Seriously? Now is not the time. Not only am I nervous as all heck, but we're on a deadline here. We notice it's raining, so Jake backs out his car and maneuvers it so I'm able to get in and not having to squeeze between the garage wall & the car. It was nice of him not making me have to get in the car w/all the rain. Side note: It was raining the day Jovi was born too. At least I think it was. I dunno, maybe not? I know it was overcast though! Anyway… We start heading out and I realize I forgot my wallet. I knew we'd need it in order to check in (proof of identity), so we turn around and head back. Ugh! Running late already. Jake runs in the house and grabs my wallet out of the diaper bag and off we went (again). We pull up to the hospital and it's not really raining, so we park and walk into the hospital together. I brought in my hospital bag and that was it. Jake would have time, later, to go out to the car and get everything else. We walk into the hospital and an employee stops me asking if today was my day hahaha I let her know it was and that I was really excited. Jake and I went up to the 3rd floor. I picked up the phone just outside the elevator and a nurse asks "How can I help you?"... This is it. We're goin in! Jake and I check in at the front desk, he asks (yet again) about the friendship bracelets, and they walk us to our room. We passed by the room where I was being monitored earlier that week. It was crazy to think that just a few days prior, I was in this tiny room POSSIBLY having our baby girl that night. And now, here we were just days later. I couldn't believe this was really happening. THIS WAS REALLY HAPPENING! I think I was freaking out so much, because I was more aware this time around, and my OB actually told me that I'd be walking myself into the operating room. That in itself freaked me out. I don't wanna walk in there & see everything. Although everything's covered (I know), it still just wasn't the same as being wheeled in. It was the whole thought behind it & that I knew what was going to be happening to me in just moments. (Okay, more like hours). Anyways…
I get checked into this labor & delivery room where this nice, older, lady greets me. She was so happy & chipper. At such an early hour too! I guess they're used to it though? Anyways…
I change into my hospital gown, out my clothes in a hospital bag, and sit down on the bed, waiting for the next nurse to come in.
Another little, older, lady comes in to give us our friendship bracelets, get me hooked up to an IV and asks me A TON of questions. I let the nurse know the IV in my hand was a tad bit uncomfortable, but she said that's normal and that after awhile my body would be used to it & to just wait it out. Sure enough, she was right. Smart lady. At this time I'm having all these fluids being pumped through my body. Naturally I ask what they're all for. The little nurse tells me they're pumping lots of fluid through my body, to help me through surgery and that often times it helps to not make you feel as nauseous. Thank goodness! Finally some anti nausea! I didn't want a repeat from last time. We all remember what happened last time, don't we? (Let me re-cap for you. I threw up just a few times. Just a few.) I was starting to feel a cold sensation through my IV in my hand. Weirdest feeling ever. The nurse said I was feeling all the fluids being pumped in my body.
After everything was all hooked up, I drank this citrus, tart drink. (I remembered this from last time.) The nurse let me know Trish, the anesthesiologist, would be in to talk to me. I was excited to talk to her & let her know my worries & fears from last time. Enter in Trish. Her voice sounded raspy. "Great," I thought. "She's sick." Nope. She let me know it was just allergies. Niiiice. (Like they would let a sicky in a sterile environment anyway). Trish told me it's best if I'm just open & honest w/her and let her know ahead of time how I'm feeling, so she can try and help me. I was feeling pretty good right about now. I felt I already could trust her. She felt so bad for what happened w/my previous experience & wanted so badly to make this a positive one.
She asked if I had hydromorph last time. I wasn't sure what I had, as it was such a blur, but I know I had MORPHINE and it was brutal. That's what made me spew! Trish let me know I probably threw up because my body was laboring for so long (32 hours), and had an empty stomach. My body also probably went into shock and was just exhausted! I was still hesitant to get this cousin of morphine, and I think she could tell. She was very convincing, this one, and wanted me ever so badly to get this in my IV so I agreed to it. She said a lot of people come off of it itching and that's normal, but that she'd personally rather have the itching allergic reaction, than feel more pain. I agreed and Jake and I both thought it'd be a good idea to get it.
Trish left the room & kept coming back to check in on me. This was making me feel even better! (Poor lady. She could sense my fear).
The nurse came back in to let me know Dr. Allen should be in soon (provided he's on time), and that they were just finishing up another surgery and then I could head back.
Cool.
Dr. Allen was scheduled to arrive @ 8am and that he did! He obviously came straight to my room when he arrived, since he still had his coat on and it had a few fresh rain drops on it. Guess it was still sprinkling outside!
Dr. Allen asked if I was ready & that we'd be heading back shortly!
I asked the nurse if they were putting my cathiter in now, or if they were waiting for the epidural. She chuckled and told me they were nice enough to wait until I was nice and numb & comfortable. "WOW," I thought. "This is already a whole new experience and we've only just begun!" I couldn't wait to see what else was in store!!!! No really.
A team of nurses came in & let me know I could head on back. "Uh… I'm half naked and don't really feel like mooning everyone on the third floor," I told the nurses. They gave me another hospital gown and draped it over me like a cape. They let Jake know they were going to take me back & that they'd come back for him in a bit... And so the walk began.
I walk through a set of double doors. And then I see the OR
Right before I went in, they gave me a hair net (for sanitary purposes), and then I apologized to the nurse for not pulling my hair up. Can you tell I was nervous?!?!
I walk in the OR and they have me get on the operating table. So weird! I was half asleep & completely drugged last time, so I don't remember seeing the operating table. I do remember it feeling small, but I don't remember seeing it. (Just for the record, it does look really small BTW).
Trish comes in and sits behind me w/her table of "stuff" ie- drugs. She asks me to sit indian style on the operating table, and to tuck my neck into my chest. She puts in the epidural, except it's not really an epidural at all. It's different. It essentially does the same thing, but better! It's what they call a spinal. The epidural (I guess) can only get so close to your spine, while the SPINAL goes directly INTO your spine & kicks in quicker/works stronger. My doctor tried to explain this ahead of time, but I didn't believe him. Boy was this stuff great. I was already numb & it had only been a few minutes. AWESOME!
The doctor who'd be assisting (Dr. Clark) came in & let me know he'd be helping w/the surgery. I'd seen this doctor a couple times, throughout this pregnancy, whenever I'd have a random appointment & didn't care if I could get in with Dr. Allen. He was real nice and I liked him. (Actually, during one of my random visits w/him, he let me know he'd probably be assisting in the surgery with Dr. Allen, so that made me feel good, knowing I had already seen him a time or two prior).
So the epidural is now in at this point, and everything's working great. Vitals are looking good and I'm feeling awesome. Trish lets me know I can lay back & that she'll catch me on the table. I lean back & the L&D nurses put in my cathiter. I don't feel A THING and it's wonderful! They start putting iodine on my stomach, and prepping everything for surgery. The drape goes up.
In walks Jake. He tells me I'm doing great so far and I'm thinking "Nothing's happened!" hahaha
Dr. Allen starts the procedure and everything's going smoothly. They let Jake know they could see baby's head and that she'd be out soon. They asked Jake if he wanted to see them pull her out, so of course he stands up to see! I wanted pictures, but he couldn't do it. Oh well :) I understand it's not pretty.
Dr. Allen pulls out baby girl's head and says she has hair and is winking at us w/one eye open! Awwwwww!!!! I was excited she had hair, seeing as Jovi didn't have hardly any. The doctors told me I'd feel a lot of pressure, and to take a deep breath. WOW did I feel that! And out came baby! The nurse brought her over to me and I kissed her cheeks so many times! It was so great being as aware & alert as I was. I remember it perfectly. It felt so great to have her by my side. I gave her so many kiss on her cheeks. I remember I kept saying "Awwww!" She was crying so much, it was great! It's so good for them to get those lungs working.
They continue to stitch me up and everything's going smoothly. Jake is down in the nursery, taking pictures of her first bath & everything, since I was doing so great. I communicate w/Trish the whole time and let her know whenever I'd start feeling nauseous. She was so great, patting my arm, and just letting me know every step of the way how close we were getting to the end.
Surgery's complete.
The nurses move me to the recovery bed & this was the rough part I remember. No, I can't feel anything pain wise, but they have you roll onto your side and you feel like you're going to fall off the super small operating table. Anyway, that gets done and they wheel me away on my portable bed. That ride is THE worst. I felt so nauseous already and let the nurses know. They used one of Trish's tricks, and put the oxygen over my nose, to breathe in the cold, flowing air. It definitely helped, but man I felt like they were running through that hallway (even though I know they weren't).
So I get in my recovery room, which is the same room I was originally checked into. They sit me up and I immediately start throwing up. I was spewing for what felt like hours. It was over an hour that I was just throwing up & throwing up. I felt like I was going to pop out my stitches. At one point I even asked the nurse if I was going to rip through my stitches. She said I COULD, but that it wasn't likely. She let me know she was going to leave to go get something for me, and when she came back, it literally felt like HOURS had gone by. I was just sitting in my recovery room all alone, and drugged, and throwing up. I felt awful! The nurse knew I had to stop vomiting soon, and that I needed something quick. They ordered a prescription from the pharmacist, but it was taking longer than normal. The nurse called down there and ended up just picking it up herself. She ended up giving me something that helped me pretty quick. Boy was I thankful.
They finally wheeled me to my recovery room on the second floor, after I was stable enough. I felt so hot and was still super groggy, but I was starting to come out of it. And then I started throwing up again. Great. Jake was no where to be found yet.
*** Now the sad/scary part ***
Presley came out breathing about 100 breaths per minute. (They normally like to see newborns at about 60/70 BPM so that was high.) She was breathing so much & so fast, that she blew a hole in her lungs and it had already caused an infection. They took her, right away, to the level 2 nursery (which is just a step down from the NICU), and Jake was talking w/her pediatrician and nurses the whole time. He, later, came into my room, and tried to explain everything to me. I'm not really understanding, as I'm still coming off the drugs and am in MAJOR pain.
She was officially diagnosed w/pneomothorax.
I wasn't able to have our sweet girl in my room to begin feeding, but I began pumping and trying to get as much colostrum as possible, for her. They were going to try to give it to her, provided she did well throughout the night. I was hopeful that this infection would clear, and that she'd be able to eat.
My mom had Jovi at the house, and later brought her to the hospital w/my brother, Austin, who came down for the weekend from BYU-Idaho. Later, my sister (Kelsey) joined them, and I had to inform them that she was in the level 2 nursery, and that she wasn't able to be in our room, nor would Jovi be able to see her :( I was so sad, as I was anxiously awaiting the day for these two to meet. They brought flowers and a card that said "SMILE from Jovi."
Jake and my brother gave Presley a blessing, Friday night. I wasn't able to be there to hear it, as I was still recovering and not keeping much down. It was the first blessing my brother assisted in, though, and my mom was able to be there as well. She said it was just beautiful & that Jake was real emotional.
Everyone was able to go down to the nursery to see Presley. All except Jovi, of course. I ended up forcing myself to get up and walk as much as possible (reminding myself that I didn't do this last time & ended up in worse shape than I should've). I walked down the hallway to the nursery, later that evening, even though I probably shouldn't have. I was determined to see my baby girl though, and I wanted off this dang liquid diet! I was focused and determined! I had Jake and the nurses help me w/carrying my IV drip and my bag of urine, as my cathiter was still in. Seriously, grossest thing ever walking around w/a bag of urine hahaha
I saw my baby girl hooked up to all these monitors and my momma heart broke. I couldn't hold her & cuddle her like I wanted to. I could only hold her w/a pillow underneath me, helping keep organize all the chords & wires. It was the best and worst moment of my life, at that time. I was in sweet baby heaven holding my little miracle babe, but so tired and in so much pain, as I felt the drugs wearing off. I was starting to dose, and knew it was time to put her back so I could go back to my room & rest.
I sent Jake home to get rest, and so I could get rest as well.
The doctors and nurses were keeping me updated throughout the night, in telling me how our sweet baby girl was doing.
A doctor came into my room, early the next morning, letting me know they were thinking of taking her up to Primary Children's Hospital in SLC and that I should call my husband just in case they were thinking of doing so.
I called Jake and informed him of everything that went on throughout the night. He left the house and rushed down to the hospital. I let him know he probably had enough time to stop for breakfast if he wanted.
The doctor came BACK into my room and said that they were DEFINITELY taking Presley and that it'd be via life flight. I called Jake and told him he didn't have ANY time to stop, and that he just needed to get down here ASAP.
Life flight came in our room, had me sign consent forms, and then the blur hits.
Jake goes to the nursery and watches as life flight hooks up our baby girl to everything. I had so many emotions flowing through me. I just sat in my bed, in the recovery room, and wait. It's all I could do. I somewhat got ready, as fast and as much as I could.
We had asked if they could bring Presley into our room, before they took her, and they agreed. The doctor who had kept us informed of everything all night long, had agreed to give Presley a blessing w/Jake before they'd take off. He said if he wasn't still there, that surely we'd be able to find someone else :)
The time had come for life flight to bring in our sweet P. and Jake gave a beautiful blessing to our baby girl, along w/a respiratory therapist (Lamar). I had never seen Jake cry in the all the years of knowing him. I've also never known him to have tear ducts. Until now.
The pain I felt at that moment, is undescribable. I still can't even begin to touch on words the thoughts that were going through my mind at that point. I don't know that I'll ever be able to go back to that place again. It's a place in my mind I will never EVER forget, and it's a place I wish for no other parent to experience. EVER.
Presley flies away.
...We quickly ordered lunch, since Jake got a free meal while I was in the hospital. When our food arrived, neither one of us were hungry. All I kept talking about, was how much I wanted to leave the hospital. We realized that wasn't really a possibility, seeing as it was just over 24 hours I underwent major surgery. We started looking at other options. Jake was thinking he'd go down to the hospital where Presley was being transferred to. We both agreed someone needed to be down there w/her. We both didn't want to leave just myself in the hospital though. My mental state was NOT good. What were we to do? My mom couldn't come down & stay in my room, because she was watching Jovi. Heaven knows she'd be a busy bee running around the hospital. Should we have someone from Relief Society come down to hang out w/me and keep me occupied? Should I just ask what the odds are of me being released? Done. I called in my nurse and asked if I could talk to whatever doctor was doing rounds. I was in luck. Doctor Clark (who assisted in my surgery) was doing rounds that morning. I was told he'd be in my room shortly after 12 noon. That hour could NOT come soon enough. When he came in my room, I asked if I could be released, considering what had just happened to our baby girl. He asked how I had been feeling, looked at my vitals, checked my dressing, and gave me the okay. What?!?! How, I don't know, but all I know was that I was free.
We were on our way to see our baby girl.
The rest of the week was cuh-razy as we drove back & forth from our home to the hospital. Each time I left, my heart broke more and more and it became harder and harder. Luckily our sweet Jovi was at home to greet us every night. She is such a little light in our lives and definitely helped distract us from the hard times. The ward was so helpful will contributing meals and helping us any way they could. It was such a stressful time. Bills were being forgotten about and birthdays were being unnoticed.
People kepis asking what I wanted to do for my birthday, and all I kept saying was that I wasn't even thinking about it. I really just wanted to hold my baby girl.
And that I got. A day early in fact!
I wasn't able to have our sweet girl in my room to begin feeding, but I began pumping and trying to get as much colostrum as possible, for her. They were going to try to give it to her, provided she did well throughout the night. I was hopeful that this infection would clear, and that she'd be able to eat.
My mom had Jovi at the house, and later brought her to the hospital w/my brother, Austin, who came down for the weekend from BYU-Idaho. Later, my sister (Kelsey) joined them, and I had to inform them that she was in the level 2 nursery, and that she wasn't able to be in our room, nor would Jovi be able to see her :( I was so sad, as I was anxiously awaiting the day for these two to meet. They brought flowers and a card that said "SMILE from Jovi."
We also got flowers from Jake's company he works for.
Jake and my brother gave Presley a blessing, Friday night. I wasn't able to be there to hear it, as I was still recovering and not keeping much down. It was the first blessing my brother assisted in, though, and my mom was able to be there as well. She said it was just beautiful & that Jake was real emotional.
Everyone was able to go down to the nursery to see Presley. All except Jovi, of course. I ended up forcing myself to get up and walk as much as possible (reminding myself that I didn't do this last time & ended up in worse shape than I should've). I walked down the hallway to the nursery, later that evening, even though I probably shouldn't have. I was determined to see my baby girl though, and I wanted off this dang liquid diet! I was focused and determined! I had Jake and the nurses help me w/carrying my IV drip and my bag of urine, as my cathiter was still in. Seriously, grossest thing ever walking around w/a bag of urine hahaha
I saw my baby girl hooked up to all these monitors and my momma heart broke. I couldn't hold her & cuddle her like I wanted to. I could only hold her w/a pillow underneath me, helping keep organize all the chords & wires. It was the best and worst moment of my life, at that time. I was in sweet baby heaven holding my little miracle babe, but so tired and in so much pain, as I felt the drugs wearing off. I was starting to dose, and knew it was time to put her back so I could go back to my room & rest.
I sent Jake home to get rest, and so I could get rest as well.
The doctors and nurses were keeping me updated throughout the night, in telling me how our sweet baby girl was doing.
A doctor came into my room, early the next morning, letting me know they were thinking of taking her up to Primary Children's Hospital in SLC and that I should call my husband just in case they were thinking of doing so.
I called Jake and informed him of everything that went on throughout the night. He left the house and rushed down to the hospital. I let him know he probably had enough time to stop for breakfast if he wanted.
The doctor came BACK into my room and said that they were DEFINITELY taking Presley and that it'd be via life flight. I called Jake and told him he didn't have ANY time to stop, and that he just needed to get down here ASAP.
Life flight came in our room, had me sign consent forms, and then the blur hits.
Jake goes to the nursery and watches as life flight hooks up our baby girl to everything. I had so many emotions flowing through me. I just sat in my bed, in the recovery room, and wait. It's all I could do. I somewhat got ready, as fast and as much as I could.
We had asked if they could bring Presley into our room, before they took her, and they agreed. The doctor who had kept us informed of everything all night long, had agreed to give Presley a blessing w/Jake before they'd take off. He said if he wasn't still there, that surely we'd be able to find someone else :)
The time had come for life flight to bring in our sweet P. and Jake gave a beautiful blessing to our baby girl, along w/a respiratory therapist (Lamar). I had never seen Jake cry in the all the years of knowing him. I've also never known him to have tear ducts. Until now.
Presley flies away.
...We quickly ordered lunch, since Jake got a free meal while I was in the hospital. When our food arrived, neither one of us were hungry. All I kept talking about, was how much I wanted to leave the hospital. We realized that wasn't really a possibility, seeing as it was just over 24 hours I underwent major surgery. We started looking at other options. Jake was thinking he'd go down to the hospital where Presley was being transferred to. We both agreed someone needed to be down there w/her. We both didn't want to leave just myself in the hospital though. My mental state was NOT good. What were we to do? My mom couldn't come down & stay in my room, because she was watching Jovi. Heaven knows she'd be a busy bee running around the hospital. Should we have someone from Relief Society come down to hang out w/me and keep me occupied? Should I just ask what the odds are of me being released? Done. I called in my nurse and asked if I could talk to whatever doctor was doing rounds. I was in luck. Doctor Clark (who assisted in my surgery) was doing rounds that morning. I was told he'd be in my room shortly after 12 noon. That hour could NOT come soon enough. When he came in my room, I asked if I could be released, considering what had just happened to our baby girl. He asked how I had been feeling, looked at my vitals, checked my dressing, and gave me the okay. What?!?! How, I don't know, but all I know was that I was free.
We were on our way to see our baby girl.
And that I got. A day early in fact!
Jake and I were both able to hold her the next day as well!
Presley was in the NICU for a total of 9 days. We were finally able to bring her home, the Sunday after she was born. Thank goodness! It was a rough week w/o our sweet baby in our home. We were so excited to finally begin our journey w/her.
My mom and Jovi had hung these floral banners in all the windows & made this super cute sign.
She came home on oxygen (1/32 of a liter), so not that much at all. We were told she'd probably be on oxygen for at least a month, but it was much shorter than that. Two days after she was released from the NICU, she had her check up w/her pediatrician and we let him know her monitors hadn't really been going off. Her monitors were set to alarm if her heart rate dropped below 75 BPM, or went higher than 220 BPM. The only time those went off, was when she was crying & mad. The other monitored alarmed us if she took too many or too little breaths per minute. And those only went off is she was sitting funky in her car seat/stroller. It was hard having her hooked up to these monitors and oxygen, walking around w/all these chords and such. Big sister Jovi did SUCH a great job of not playing w/them and or tripping over them, though. That was my main worry. I mean- She'd take Presley's oxygen out of her nose every once in awhile, but that was it.
Presley June Strain
05/15/15 at 8:42am
6 lbs. 15 oz. and 19 in.
Presley, we went through so much to get you. From the start of my pregnancy w/you, to the day we finally brought you home. You were placed in our lives for a reason, and I think I finally figured out why. We are so thankful that Heavenly Father has trusted us w/such a tender person in our home. We love having you, snuggling you, and hearing your little noises. You grunt, squeak, burp, and pass gas more than anyone I've ever known. We love hearing all these noises though. It lets us know you're more than okay :) Your big sister loves you more than words. She constantly gives you kisses w/o us even asking. She knows so much & loves so much about you- More than we give her credit for. We love having you in our room at night, and we love driving around town w/you in our back seat. There is nothing better than having my two girls, and husband, in the backseat of the car. You are just the sweetest, and love snuggles. We love giving them too! We have a lot of time to make up for, since you were un-held by us those 9 days you were in the NICU. We love you so so so much. You were not easy to get, but were so so so worth it. Our family was missing this sweet piece to our puzzle. I'm glad we didn't wait longer to get it :) Thank you for coming into our family. WE are the lucky/blessed ones. I guess you are too, but more so us. I cannot describe to you enough, how much pain it caused me to see you so hurt & helpless. This mommy of yours loves you so so so much and I hope you ALWAYS know that! We love you forever and always, our sweet Miss P.
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